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10 MORE Things I Hate About The Gym
Hello, Friends!
I heard my phone ringing in the locker just as I was coming out of the steam room. It was Rye, checking with me when I'd like to have my casserole of kare-kare delivered.
"Are you hungry?"
"No," I said, feeling disgruntled rumbles within. Damn protein shake made me feel bloated and dizzy; I felt the muddy brew sloshing around my tummy. "But let's meet up, any way. Give me a call when you're ready. Let me know where you'd like to meet."
10 MORE Things I Hate About The Gym
1. Arrogant fitness trainers
"Sorry, mate. We're doing a circuit. We're gonna need that bench in a while."
Just because you're doing a PT session doesn't mean you have sole rights to the facilities, asshole. Haven't you heard of "share and share alike"?
2. Fitness trainers with stick-thin legs
I do accord some understanding and consideration to pushy fitness trainers who keep trying to sell PT sessions. After all, it's their living.
But for heaven's sake, lads, how am I supposed to believe that you can help me achieve my targets if I see that you, yourselves, are only concerned with "T-shirt muscle"?
Work those legs out and be a paragon of fun, well-rounded fitness professionals!
3. MORE mean girls
In between my bench press sets, I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder.
"Mind if we alternate?"
"Not at all. Please," I gestured towards the bench.
She then proceeded to take my plates off and loaded thrice what I was doing.
In another corner, a grandma with leathery, orange skin was doing squats that was equal to my body weight - 150lbs.
Chapeau, sisters. This is my insecure self speaking.
4. The lunch rush
Who knew? I certainly didn't. The gym gets extremely crowded from 12NN-2PM with office workers. At 2PM, the place empties up considerably until about 4:30PM, when the tai tais come in after lunching at Harvey Nicks.
I suppose I wouldn't have minded as much if I didn't recognize many of the faces - they were group class instructors and fitness trainers who were obviously catching up with sets in between their appointments.
HELLO.
Please don't compete with members when the club is at its busiest.
5. Sweaty machines
Far be it for me to castigate those with overactive sweat glands. I perspire a lot, myself. But at least I make sure that I clear my area when I finish. That includes wiping down the equipment.
There's a reason why alcohol pads are available throughout the gym.
USE THEM.
6. Skinny Chinese boys
It's not fair.
7. Fruit hoarders
There was this woman who swiped four apples from the fruit bowl and slipped them into her jelly bag.
Has the continuing downward spiral of the economy left us with no shame?
8. Dirty toilets
Again, a health club needs more than just one locker room attendant. The old uncle with his back bent from carrying heavy sacks of wet towels needs help.
HELLO.
9. Overpriced products
I don't understand why my club charges 100% more than what I pay for protein shake and creatine in Jordan or Causeway Bay.
Oh, and by the way, $60 for a sandwich and juice combo is too much. In case you haven't noticed, the economy is in a downturn.
Please respond accordingly.
10. MORE mean gays
There were these two, infatuated lovebirds gossiping like schoolgirls and making lovey-dovey eyes whilst on the elliptical machine. They were appropriately attired in shorts that were each a size smaller than they needed to wear. Afterwards, they did their weight training in tandem with discomforting displays of affection.
Chaps, can we save this sort of games for the bedroom?
And since I'm on a roll, PLEASE DON'T CHECK YOUR GAYDAR ACCOUNT IN THE GYM's COMPUTERS!!!
With Affection,
Astron
I heard my phone ringing in the locker just as I was coming out of the steam room. It was Rye, checking with me when I'd like to have my casserole of kare-kare delivered.
"Are you hungry?"
"No," I said, feeling disgruntled rumbles within. Damn protein shake made me feel bloated and dizzy; I felt the muddy brew sloshing around my tummy. "But let's meet up, any way. Give me a call when you're ready. Let me know where you'd like to meet."
10 MORE Things I Hate About The Gym
1. Arrogant fitness trainers
"Sorry, mate. We're doing a circuit. We're gonna need that bench in a while."
Just because you're doing a PT session doesn't mean you have sole rights to the facilities, asshole. Haven't you heard of "share and share alike"?
2. Fitness trainers with stick-thin legs
I do accord some understanding and consideration to pushy fitness trainers who keep trying to sell PT sessions. After all, it's their living.
But for heaven's sake, lads, how am I supposed to believe that you can help me achieve my targets if I see that you, yourselves, are only concerned with "T-shirt muscle"?
Work those legs out and be a paragon of fun, well-rounded fitness professionals!
3. MORE mean girls
In between my bench press sets, I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder.
"Mind if we alternate?"
"Not at all. Please," I gestured towards the bench.
She then proceeded to take my plates off and loaded thrice what I was doing.
In another corner, a grandma with leathery, orange skin was doing squats that was equal to my body weight - 150lbs.
Chapeau, sisters. This is my insecure self speaking.
4. The lunch rush
Who knew? I certainly didn't. The gym gets extremely crowded from 12NN-2PM with office workers. At 2PM, the place empties up considerably until about 4:30PM, when the tai tais come in after lunching at Harvey Nicks.
I suppose I wouldn't have minded as much if I didn't recognize many of the faces - they were group class instructors and fitness trainers who were obviously catching up with sets in between their appointments.
HELLO.
Please don't compete with members when the club is at its busiest.
5. Sweaty machines
Far be it for me to castigate those with overactive sweat glands. I perspire a lot, myself. But at least I make sure that I clear my area when I finish. That includes wiping down the equipment.
There's a reason why alcohol pads are available throughout the gym.
USE THEM.
6. Skinny Chinese boys
It's not fair.
7. Fruit hoarders
There was this woman who swiped four apples from the fruit bowl and slipped them into her jelly bag.
Has the continuing downward spiral of the economy left us with no shame?
8. Dirty toilets
Again, a health club needs more than just one locker room attendant. The old uncle with his back bent from carrying heavy sacks of wet towels needs help.
HELLO.
9. Overpriced products
I don't understand why my club charges 100% more than what I pay for protein shake and creatine in Jordan or Causeway Bay.
Oh, and by the way, $60 for a sandwich and juice combo is too much. In case you haven't noticed, the economy is in a downturn.
Please respond accordingly.
10. MORE mean gays
There were these two, infatuated lovebirds gossiping like schoolgirls and making lovey-dovey eyes whilst on the elliptical machine. They were appropriately attired in shorts that were each a size smaller than they needed to wear. Afterwards, they did their weight training in tandem with discomforting displays of affection.
Chaps, can we save this sort of games for the bedroom?
And since I'm on a roll, PLEASE DON'T CHECK YOUR GAYDAR ACCOUNT IN THE GYM's COMPUTERS!!!
With Affection,
Astron
women have lower centers of gravity so they really can squat more than men. I squat 150 and my but is as flat as ever. depressing.